I always feel like I have a million things to say. But then I log on and I have nothing to say. My mind just goes blank. I feel like its a case of the so many things to say, but nothing that really sticks out. So be forewarned, this may be a ramble to get my juices flowing.
My life has been such a jumble lately. A loss of inspiration, a loss of excitement. I feeling of never ending blah-ness.
Is this as good as life gets? A daily struggle? A little blip of happiness here and there. Pushing to get to the other side to just find more struggles.
I don’t know…and i sure hope not.
Lately, I have found myself getting into fiction books again. I forgot how much I loved fiction. I forgot how it takes you into another world where you just don’t want to stop reading. Its the little things like this that make me happy and help me get through the week. I just finished reading “Girls in White Dresses” by Jennifer Close. Its a good book for girls in their twenties to read. It makes me think about how life isn’t easy for anyone and all these struggles are just part of the adventure. People work jobs they hate to make money that isn’t really their’s. Over time people lose friends, and relationships end. Its as simple as that, but its scary as hell. You never know whats going to happen and that fear of the unknown scares me. I already am working at a job that drains me to make money that disappears faster then I can earn it. At least the latter, I have for now. 
But for now I am gonna focus on those little things that make me happy. Those things that make me jump up and down and smile so bright, I wanna tell the whole world how happy these things make me! So here is a little list I am starting:
1. My dorky silly boyfriend – lol, okay so this post isn’t gonna go on about the millions of reasons of why I love him, because that would probably bore you. But he always tries to make me happy even when I can be such a debbie downer as of lately. But mostly we just have fun being completely ridiculous dorks together, even if we aren’t doing much at all and that all cheers me up. 😛
2. Books – I love love books. I could read all the time, and I can quench for my thirst for all the things I want to read about. I just got back into fiction books, which is great! Because even though I love reading non-fiction, it can get exhausting and it doesn’t boost me up as much as I’d like. Some other great books I have read are “The Glass Castle” and “The Silver Stare”, both are by Jeanette Walls. I hope to continually add to to this list and enjoy this luxury of being able to read for hours after work.
3. Baking – I love baking new things. Its like art for me. It allows me to be creative and productive! And its great practice, as I am only 23 and can’t imagine how good I’ll be in 10 years! I cook and bake almost everyday and I can tell I have already learned lots about cooking and I continue to expand my horizons and try new things and see what works best.
4. Hay Day – Ack! This is for my love of role playing games. hehe. Its like farmvile, but totally cooler. You have a bakery, a dairy farm, a cow pen, a chicken coop, sugar mill, and ohmigosh so much more. I just started last night so I am only on level 10, but boy oh boy is it fun. Takes me back to my bakery story days….and farmville….ha! So if you are looking for a new addiction, I may have just pointed you in the right direction.
5. Gossip Girl – Ok, so I am not even that big of a TV person. But I love me some scandal and excitement. Sadly, I am almost done watching all the episodes, 1 season left. 
Sometimes you just need a guilty girly pleasure and this is mine. But looks like I need to find a new girly show. ASAP.
Ok, so 5 great things, that help me stay happy and normal and sane. I think 5 is a good number for today and I’d say I need a break from writing for now.
Peace, love, and turtle cookies.
<3 Chelsea Jolene
